Happiness

One more topic to discuss… Happiness….

Happiness, noun

1. The quality or state of being happy

2. Good fortune; pleasure; contentment; joy

The state of being happy…. How many can say when I wake up in the morning regardless of the day I had I am happy, and when I go to bed I close my eyes I am in that state of happiness? Not many. And let me add that that place of pure happiness in your mind and heart is a great place to be at… Regardless of any issue that is going on around you, you are able to still be in that mental state.

I always ask people are you happy, like really happy and if you’re not why not. Because in all actuality if you’re not happy you can change that. We all have that power to change and become a better u. And that’s not saying go and change for someone else you have to want that for you. You have to want to break that old thing and start something new. We all are capable of finding pure happiness if we take the time to understand ourselves. And when you do find it, there is nothing or no one that will be able to take it from you.

I don’t know how many people say I don’t know how to be happy… Smh… What they really are saying is that I am content in where I am and I am going to settle for this state right now because what reason do I have to change. And when you see that in a person you usually see that in all in that social circle. Because the term birds of a feather flock together is very much true… When you surround yourself around people and situations that aren’t happy it gets harder to see that that is not a healthy state to be at. It becomes normal for you…

Let me just say this, just because those people you associate with might be family doesn’t mean it is always the healthy… * I’ll wait*…

Let me say it one more time, just because those people you associate with might be family doesn’t mean it is always healthy…

Yes that is where things can get a little shaky because everyone is raised in saying blood is thicker than water. The way I look at it is you can’t pick your family so make sure you pick your friends wisely. That is not saying you don’t love your family it’s just saying you don’t have to deal with and surround yourself by the negative that might come from some family members. Because one bad apple will ruin the bunch… It’s natural… It only takes one person to say something negative that can either bring the group into a negative mindset. And that is a continuous cycle until you know for yourself that that is not what life is about…

There is nothing wrong with walking away. Walking away is the first step to you becoming a better you and finding that happiness that we all have in our hearts if you’re ready to have that peace in your mind and heart…

So now my question is for people, Are you happy within your life and if you’re not how are going to change it?

Living Your Past in Your Present

 I want to touch on the subject of  people living their past in their present for a second….

We all have moments in our life where we have been faced with the fact of taking a stand and making a change or just throwing up your hands and agreeing to circumstances. And when I say agree I mean making excuses for another. In no way does making excuses benefit you in no such way. It holds you back… It’s kind of like putting a leash around your neck and following your owner…

When inside do you tell yourself you are tired and can’t do it anymore? When do you put an end to the possessiveness of another whether it physical or mental… The real question is what allows a person to become that obedient person? At what stage in their life did the rode veer to the left and was not able to make it back to the straight path?? Whether it is intentional or non-intentional. When do we as individuals find understanding from the past to have a better future?

We have to understand that when not dealing with those stages in life and healing from it we are not able to move forward in a positive mind… In no way can that be possible… I have listened too many and found out they are scared to visit that past... To open that chapter of their life and address it head on… if issues go unaddressed in your life how are you able to move forward in a positive light… Your past will always have a hold over your present and future. It will find its way to halt you in your steps of mental progression if left unaddressed.

I have also come to see that many believe they will be judged by their past. In no way can anyone judge another that is a form of negativity… if there was less negativity coming out of our mouths there would be less issues coming up… The term so many use, ‘”think before you speak”, but not many do. Not many step out of the box and think first before they react to someone else’s actions or words. Because 9 times out of 10 those words that you are speaking is the truth for your own life your living. You live those negative words every day. So of course it becomes easy for you to say it because it is second nature… hmmm… And yes that is a horrible place to be at. Not being able to stop think and change your negative mindset because you have been living it so long.

It takes less energy to be happy then to always have a negative comment being directed at people. Look inside yourself and see what really is causing you to think the way your thinking and make that change in your life to become a better you…

The Difference between the Physical and Mental Aspects of Love in Relations...

So I came across this topic on numerous occasions in discussions… Love comes up in many different ways. But do we really understand what the meaning of the word Love is? Can we decipher the difference between the physical and mental part of Love… I believe we can…

Let’s first look at the meaning of Love…

Love, noun

1       a (1): strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties (2): attraction based on sexual desire: affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3): affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests b: an assurance of affection

2:      warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion

3       a: the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration b (1): a beloved person: darling —often used as a term of endearment (2) British—used as an informal term of address

4       a: unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (1): the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2): brotherly concern for others b: a person's adoration of God

5:     a god or personification of love

6:      an amorous episode:

7:     the sexual embrace:

There were many more definitions for the word Love. I’m only going to discuss a few. In my reading of The Art of Loving, by Erich Fromm (must read) it took me 3 weeks to finish. Not because it was a long book but because to understand the words that were written on each page took time to mentally receive.

We have all been in different relationships and some ended for different reasons, but let’s dig into the reason for the short comings. In the begging all was well... It was fun having the companion to be attached to… The newness of it all was exciting… But when there was no more excitement or fun what was left of it? That is the question that should be asked. Was it Love or Lust? Many times it was lust that brought you together not Love. You saw what you wanted and went for it. No questions asked. Many fell into it for Lust then hoped that some kind of Love came from it… But how can you expect Love, the ultimate mental state of oneself, to come about later on when that wasn’t the basis of the joining together in the beginning… It’s a battle that is trying to be fought but never once understood…

Are you following me?

A battle that is fought but never once understood… How can one fight for Love when they really have no idea of what it truly means? To Love is more than just stating it, it’s about knowing and living in that state. If your unable to live in that state of love how is it your suppose to build something based on it if you’re not living in it for oneself everyday. To be able to give love to another you have to be able to give it to oneself. You have to be able to understand it mentally not physically for you. Not understanding the true meaning and being able to give that love without expecting anything in return puts your mind in a state of Lust… It’s like saying if you love me I love you or I give myself to you and you do the same… That is not Love that is Lust… Expecting something in return is not Love, because when you’re truly mentally mature with yourself you don’t expect anything in return but the gift of giving that mature Love and the other being able to receive it on that same level of mental maturity…

In saying that, that’s where the difference in a Lust vs. Love happens… If we all based our relations on mature mental love it wouldn’t break to the physical aspect of lust… If we all are able to become one within ourselves mentally we will be able to give that ultimate mature Love…

                                                         ~S~

Change comes only when you are ready...

So I was told today I should start a blog.. So here I am..

My words are from what I have learned and adapt to my everyday life.. In no way am I saying anyone needs to live by the words.. Some may not understand the reasoning behind what I say but to each is own. I can't make everyone happy. I can only give what was giving to me to try and help another.

We all come to a point in life when we are tired of being tired.. And the question arises are you ready to "Change".. Change you mental state of mind, change your perspective of the ability to find oneself..

It all begins with you.. You are the only one that knows when its time for a change in your life.. No one man can tell you to change, you have to want it for you... When your able to except the fact in your mind and move forward in a positive thought process the things that use to consume your everyday being wont anymore..

There is nothing like going to bed happy and waking up happy... It's an indescribable feeling.. Hope everyone enjoys and receives something from this journey that I so much want to share..

Open your mind so you are able to open your heart and spread the Joy of Love in Life...